Stage Rules. We all have some, what are yours?

[TU BE]

A lot of good one already mentioned. Here's a few more to add:

No wireless heasdet mics, unless you're a drummer that does lead/backup vocals. Otherwise, leave that shit to Britney Spears.

Don't use the excuse of having a wireless unit to jump out into the crowd and act like you're some badass. You look like a douche.

This sometimes help get the crowd involved. Our singer does it quite a bit when he has a wireless mic. I've been known to do it occasionally as well. It can easily be overdone and look douchebaggy though.

[Dave]

Yeah my singer gets up on bars/tables/whatever he can when he is using his wireless mic. It's generally pretty awesome

[BrendanO]

There is no excuse for headset mics. Ever. Because even if you got not hands, mic stands have already been invented. Don't strap that shit to your head; you might as well put in your Bluetooth earchip and start "talking to your stockbroker" a little too loud in crowded place.

[Dave]

There is no excuse for headset mics. Ever. Because even if you got not hands, mic stands have already been invented. Don't strap that shit to your head; you might as well put in your Bluetooth earchip and start "talking to your stockbroker" a little too loud in crowded place.

Wireless =|= headset


When he plays guitar he has a mic stand because a boy band headset mic would get shoved up a drummer's ass

[Telephant]

spawn you drunk?

I just now saw those, and have no memory of them epic to myself. I don't even know what thats supposed to mean

Oh snap, you pulled a me!!!

[tweed]

No one is saying you gotta wear a suit or wear "nice clothes." Just look the part. How lame would it be to see Behemoth and instead of all their metal garb they were wearing khaki cargo shorts and white tennis shoes on stage? Totally fucking lame. You're on a stage. Its a show, not your garage practice where you and your buddies trade licks over Mustang Sally.

-5 Man points for the shear mention of Mustang Sally.

[Dickarms]

nah bra, we live in texas

i have literally been to that jam. 5 60-yo dudes jamming mustang sally for HOURS. no joke.

had a dude at work the other day, perpetual bullshitter, anyway, was talking about this "monthly jam" he attends where like 10 or 12 guitar players get together and trade solos on voodoo chile. that everyone plugs amps in, etc., and that they go in circles for up to 6 hours. on voodoo chile only. told me i should hit him up on it.


that sounds like hell on earth, bill, no fucking thanks.

[spawnofthesith]

^Holy shit

[100 watt]

another old rule I forgot about ... KEEP THE PINCH HARMONICS (AKA Zakk Squeelies) to a minimum.

I used to jam with a guy who had to throw those into EVERYTHING

[Dolf]

I've only really got the one rule:

All spandex, all the time.

[Dave]

I've only really got the one rule:

All spandex, all the time.

/thread

[Sasquatch]

I've only really got the one rule:

All spandex, all the time.

you should duct tape your dickandbawlz in some odd, deformed looking way.

[Reverse Entropy]

Metal bands should wear color coordinated pin-striped suits on stage. With Fedoras.
Or Tuxedos. In hideous wedding pale blue. Or fifties doo-wop band yellow.
Shit. I started that as a joke and now I kinda wanna see it.

Oh, I've said that before myself. I want to see a band in nice suits come on stage in a dive bar and rip into face melting thrashing metal and I want them to be fucking good. That is the punchline to the joke, right there.

...and I agree with you, don't put your beer on my amp.
"I put a cup holder on your mike stand for a reason, dumbass !"

Dude, that's Steve Fucking Harris...Rules that apply to mortal men don't apply to Steve Fucking Harris.

LOL. Imagine his dad when he was born, speaking to the doctor.

"Yes, yes. That's right. Middle name 'Fucking'. Steve Fucking Harris."

[Telephant]

LOL. Imagine his dad when he was born, speaking to the doctor.

"Yes, yes. That's right. Middle name 'Fucking'. Steve Fucking Harris."

I LOL'd IRL. Well done.

[ShaneV]

I've only really got the one rule:

All spandex, all the time.

That's not a stage rule. It's a life rule.

[Elessar [Sly]]

If I get a 'I love you' from the audience I break into gaybar by electric 6. I have now convinced the band to join me in this for a 30 second rendition of the song

[Reverse Entropy]

If I get a 'I love you' from the audience I break into gaybar by electric 6. I have now convinced the band to join me in this for a 30 second rendition of the song

Oh if you cover that...that is fucking awesome. I'd buy the whole band a round of shots for that.

"Once again, on the drums...my drummer !" You should cover "She's White" also. That should get everyone jumpin'

[Dickarms]

If I get a 'I love you' from the audience I break into gaybar by electric 6. I have now convinced the band to join me in this for a 30 second rendition of the song

holy shit that rad.

"thanks a lot, this songs calle---"
"I LOOOVE YOOOOOOOOOOOU!!!!!!"
*hit it guys*


YOU! I WANNA TAKE YA TO A GAY BAR!!!!"

[Elessar [Sly]]

If I get a 'I love you' from the audience I break into gaybar by electric 6. I have now convinced the band to join me in this for a 30 second rendition of the song

holy shit that rad.

"thanks a lot, this songs calle---"
"I LOOOVE YOOOOOOOOOOOU!!!!!!"
*hit it guys*


YOU! I WANNA TAKE YA TO A GAY BAR!!!!"

EXACTLY like that. If nobody manages to shout it out during a set then it is during the 'thanks guys we really appreaciate you coming blah blah blah' *FRODO/SAM MOMENT*

*gay bar riff... bassist joins in... then drummer... and.... 'I wanna take you ALL to a gay bar'*