Just got this from future mother in law

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Lloyd Blankfein
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Just got this from future mother in law

Post by Lloyd Blankfein »

Got this sweet chain email. Apparently everyone got this, including my fiancé. It was entertaining in a monster jam, gravedigger sort of way.

"
Gentlemen, being a man is great. You get to use your muscles to pick up heavy things, you get to use your dick to fuck things, and you get to use your brain to think and create things. It’s no wonder feminist’s hate men – they desperately want what we have but they can never have it. But how the heck have they convinced MEN that being a man is bad or evil?

And convinced they have.

Unless you’re blind you have noticed a trend: American men are less like men and more like little boys, effeminate little boys stuck in a state of arrested development. Even worse, some men apologize for being men or supplicate and pander to women, minorities and gays. Next time you watch a newer movie with a masculine, alpha male character go to imdb.com and look up the actor. You will see one thing in common: all strong, white male characters under 40 years of age are imported from Ireland or Australia. Instead of explaining in detail the reasons for this pussification (it would take pages upon pages and I’m a man, I don’t have time for nonsense. I’d rather talk about winning, but this information has to spread.) I will gloss over the reasons and give you some links to read for yourself. See also: 7 Reasons Modern Western Men Are Effete Weaklings (And What to do About it)

Reasons why men have been pussified:

1) Diet – The average Man eats a diet high in processed carbohydrates as outlined to be healthy by the food pyramid. News flash, the food pyramid is bogus. It’s cheaper to produce grains than it is meat and other animal products, and it’s more profitable. A box of cereal can sit on the shelf for months, a cut of steak can sit on the shelf only a few days. A high fat/high protein diet is essential for the production of testosterone, evidenced by our caveman ancestors – imagine a fight between an average caveman and an average male office worker. The pussiest of the pussy men eschew meat all-together in favor of a soy based diet. Another news flash, soy is an estrogen enhancing garbage by-product repackaged and sold as health food and Americans eat more of it that anyone.

2) Women’s Liberation – Women’s Lib has taught Men one thing: Women are right, always. Men are wrong, always. In the media Men are constantly portrayed as buffoons to their all-knowing spouse or girlfriend. According to the media you must always bow down to your Woman. Here are a few things you may not know: A) Most Women don’t like to be in charge, they want a Man who can lead. B) Women’s Lib is a crock of horse-shit. Not that I’m saying Women should not have rights, what I’m saying is that Women were NEVER discriminated against or oppressed in the first place. Men used to work all day to provide for their wives and children. C) Women and Men are not the same and they are not equal. There are differences in the gender which is why for the entire history of mankind Men have been the providers and Women have been the caregivers. Societies fall apart with the destruction of the nuclear family brought on by the “empowerment” of women. The tides are turning, Women are becoming more masculine and Men are becoming more feminine.

3) Lack of exercise – How could a Man possibly be anything other than a lump of lard if he never exercises? He can’t.

4) Lack of Father Figures – More and more kids are being raised by single moms. You can’t have a complete development with only half of the building blocks. In the media Men are portrayed as completely unnecessary, which is completely true of your goal is to raise criminal children.

5) Government Sponsored Emasculation – An estrogen enhancing diet is pushed onto you from all angles by your government. You are fed a line of nonsense about women and men being equal yet divorce court can ruin a man and can only improve a woman’s situation, no matter the reason for the divorce. The wealth is systematically distributed from the man to the woman via divorce theft. It’s a fact that Women consume far more than Men, if Women end up with the money in the long run they are going to by more useless shit which lines the pockets of those in charge. Every ad, TV show, Movie, and misc media portrays Women as the smarter, better sex and Men as weaklings. Men are taught to be ashamed of their masculinity. The CIA has admitted to funding the advancement of Women’s Liberation with the stated goal of taxing women, whom they could not tax when they were not working.

6) Political Correctness is a soul-killer of man. In a PC culture most men have to walk on eggshells to not offend any women or minorities or gays. All Human Resources departments are staffed with women and gay minorities ready to kill anything that isn’t supplication to politically correct fantasies of equality and pedestalization of women, gays and minorities. Working men have to avoid charges of sexism, racism, and sexual harassment at all costs. Whatever happened to kicking ass and taking names? Now it’s licking ass and taking blame.

What’s a Man to do?

Never eat soy! Eat meat. Meat is the man’s food. Load up on steak, eggs, chicken, raw milk, butter and all other real products. Limit your consumption of processed food (one day a week is fine). Eat high protein, moderate to high fat, and low carbohydrate to boost testosterone. Eat grass-fed beef if you can afford it.

Lift heavy weights. You can hardly be a man and be a weakling at the same time. Bosu ball nonsense if ok for the girls (not really) but no man should be caught dead doing shoulder presses with 10 lb dumbbells off a stability ball.

Learn to defend yourself. A man doesn’t need to start fights but if the shit hits the fan he needs to be able to defend himself and his family. Learn to box, learn MMA, buy a gun but do something. Defending yourself is perfectly fine (even against a woman) but only a repugnant coward beats on those weaker than him. Caveat: You MUST discipline your kids or they too will turn into spoiled little nancy-boys. If you choose to spank that’s your perogotive.

Don’t take shit from anybody unless it is a calculated and temporary strategy to get ahead or to get something you need. Stop the supplication and pandering.

The corporate world has gone to the dogs (well, Hyenas), perhaps it’s time to leave. Entrepreneurship is one of mans greatest callings.

There is no such as “redefining masculinity” – only emasculation

That doesn’t mean that you have to start watching football or start barbecuing every Saturday and drinking coors. What it does mean is that you should never be ashamed or apologize for your masculinity. You should love it, it’s great. Most older men have wised up to the ways of the world but young men are still being spoon-fed these lies and just don’t know what they should do. Friend, you’ve got two choices: be a man or don’t. If no one treats you like a Man that’s probably because you don’t act like one. Learn to cultivate your masculinity. You are a man, goddammit, act like one!"




:handshake:
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ShaneV
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by ShaneV »

Re point 4: I thought George Michael was seeing to that.
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Lloyd Blankfein
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by Lloyd Blankfein »

After reading that, I feel like I need to sit on my roof in a lawn chair and drink bud diesel.


While watching monster trucks.
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BrendanO
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by BrendanO »

Huh. So that's what horseshit looks like all typed out.
Misplaced priorities and squandered opportunities.
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Lloyd Blankfein
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by Lloyd Blankfein »

BrendanO wrote:Huh. So that's what horseshit looks like all typed out.

Sounds like you need less carbs in your diet.
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by benjamin801 »

Laughed so hard I fell off my balance ball, spilling my bowl of Special K all over the yoga mat. :cry:
"If there was only a way that I couldn't even any less than I already can't then I'd gladly not, but I think I've entered some quantum paradox, dark matter levels of can't evening where the total absolute value of not evenness exceeds all ability to explain the can'ting." - MR RUBATO
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ShaneV
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by ShaneV »

benjamin801 wrote:Laughed so hard I fell off my balance ball, spilling my bowl of Special K all over the yoga mat. :cry:


That sounds really hard. If you need to talk about I just want to listen, I won't try to problem solve.
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by racerevlon »

You'll do your best? Losers do their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen.
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by Le_Marteau »

Kill your mother in law, and if the daughter is anything like that drop her like Clapton's son out of a window.
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by The Hiryuu »

Le_Marteau wrote:drop her like Clapton's son out of a window.


:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by rear naked »

lol OP is impressed by that
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by Dickarms »

you lost me at chain email :facepalm:
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by ComOp »

Lloyd, do you enjoy the comedy of Jeff Dunham? From your post here I suspect that this might be the case.
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by rear naked »

ComOp wrote:Lloyd, do you enjoy the comedy of Jeff Dunham? From your post here I suspect that this might be the case.


Oh come on...

that chain email is jus' tellin' it like it is, maine.
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by frumiousbandersnatch »

Real Men don't read.
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by BrendanO »

frumiousbandersnatch wrote:Real Men don't read.


Real Men masturbate while thinking about Sally Struthers.
Misplaced priorities and squandered opportunities.
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by VTM »

BrendanO wrote:
frumiousbandersnatch wrote:Real Men don't read.


Real Men masturbate while thinking about Sally Struthers.


Skinny 70s Sally or fat cowboy boot wearin' 80s Sally?
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Lloyd Blankfein
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by Lloyd Blankfein »

ComOp wrote:Lloyd, do you enjoy the comedy of Jeff Dunham? From your post here I suspect that this might be the case.


Is that the guy with the silly dummies?

You must have missed the monster jam part at the beginning.


I wear brown puma shoes, the author of that post rolls thinks I'm euro ghey. :cry:
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by benjamin801 »

David Lee Broth wrote:
BrendanO wrote:
frumiousbandersnatch wrote:Real Men don't read.


Real Men masturbate while thinking about Sally Struthers.


Skinny 70s Sally or fat cowboy boot wearin' 80s Sally?


Sally surrounded by starving African children. It's the only way I can get hard. :cry: :fap:
"If there was only a way that I couldn't even any less than I already can't then I'd gladly not, but I think I've entered some quantum paradox, dark matter levels of can't evening where the total absolute value of not evenness exceeds all ability to explain the can'ting." - MR RUBATO
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by RSBro »

Lloyd Blankfein wrote:
ComOp wrote:Lloyd, do you enjoy the comedy of Jeff Dunham? From your post here I suspect that this might be the case.


Is that the guy with the silly dummies?

You must have missed the monster jam part at the beginning.


I wear brown puma shoes, the author of that post rolls thinks I'm euro ghey. :cry:


i have navy blue+purple+gray, lime green+neon orange, and powder blue+electric orange Puma shoes. not to mention the various black & white ones that don't stand out as much. they rule

also i wish i had a mom in law send me that kinda stuff lol
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by EndTime »

I agree with 1, 3,4,5,6... The women's lib thing is pushing it, but i can see points in the rest.. The food pyramid is utter and total garbage.. Its one of the worst things that's promoted as health.. And it should be #1, because "what you eat is what you are" is a lot more truthful than people think.
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by indienoise »

Y0UNGBL00D wrote:you lost me at chain email :facepalm:


that
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by jamminjohn »

benjamin801 wrote:
David Lee Broth wrote:
BrendanO wrote:
frumiousbandersnatch wrote:Real Men don't read.


Real Men masturbate while thinking about Sally Struthers.


Skinny 70s Sally or fat cowboy boot wearin' 80s Sally?


Sally surrounded by starving African children. It's the only way I can get hard. :cry: :fap:


OMG! :bang: +1


:rofl: imma still laffin'
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by SenatorClayDavis »

Lloyd Blankfein wrote:what I’m saying is that Women were NEVER discriminated against or oppressed in the first place.


:eek:
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Re: Just got this from future mother in law

Post by Telephant »

racerevlon wrote:You'll do your best? Losers do their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen.

Carla was the prom queen. :cop:
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