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After Earth
Posted: Sat Jun 01, 2013 12:22 pm
by soundgardener75
M. Night FlameAutolan, were you disappointed again that your movie didn't do well?

Re: After Earth
Posted: Sat Jun 01, 2013 12:40 pm
by sleewell
"worlds most expensive bar mitzvah."
Re: After Earth
Posted: Sat Jun 01, 2013 7:56 pm
by Noizemaker
wat
Re: After Earth
Posted: Sat Jun 01, 2013 8:29 pm
by Yarbicus
Looks like total shit.
Re: After Earth
Posted: Sat Jun 01, 2013 10:44 pm
by wrongnote85
i have no idea what is going on right now.
Re: After Earth
Posted: Sat Jun 01, 2013 10:55 pm
by Gunslinger
Yarbicus wrote:Looks like total shit.
+1
Re: After Earth
Posted: Sun Jun 02, 2013 12:41 am
by PurpleTrails
Heard it reviewed as "why nepotism should be outlawed."
Re: After Earth
Posted: Sun Jun 02, 2013 8:17 am
by Dickarms
mfpomfs
Re: After Earth
Posted: Sun Jun 02, 2013 2:49 pm
by Chris Z
I gave Shyamalan more chances than my ex-wife to make things better. Fuck him and her.
Re: After Earth
Posted: Sun Jun 02, 2013 2:56 pm
by ovid9
shine wrote:I gave Shyamalan more chances than my ex-wife to make things better. Fuck him and her.

They steadily got worse. I watched the one where the trees are out to kill everyone and said "Never again."
Then I got drunk and tried to watch the last airbender for lulz. Its not lulzy, its just terrible.
This one does not look any better.
Throw in Will Smith and family well, you have a recipe for bad acting and a terrible story.
Re: After Earth
Posted: Sun Jun 02, 2013 2:57 pm
by Dickarms
"hey son, do you want to go swing around with me in front of the green screen and rake in the cash dolled out by morons?"
"sure, dad!"
"cool. tell your sister to stop whipping her hair back and forth. in exchange, shit, i guess we could make it like i am legend has sex with avatar. she'd dig that"
Re: After Earth
Posted: Mon Jun 03, 2013 1:30 pm
by flyingskull
"miami, mmhmm, yeah"
Re: After Earth
Posted: Mon Jun 03, 2013 1:33 pm
by nightflameauto
I was disappointed it was created at all.
Seriously, SERIOUSLY don't understand how he gets to keep making movies. This one they couldn't even cook up a compelling preview. Seriously, if you can't cut thirty seconds out of your movie that make it look interesting in a big budget sci-fi, you MAY want to rethink the whole thing. Or just stay home and soak your head, face first. . . in bleach.
Re: After Earth
Posted: Mon Jun 03, 2013 1:35 pm
by Marc G
the preview didn't look that bad really... still didn't plan on going to see it though... I gave up M. Night Shamalamananananan... a long time ago..
Re: After Earth
Posted: Mon Jun 03, 2013 1:36 pm
by benjamin801
sleewell wrote:"worlds most expensive bar mitzvah."
This.
Also, since I'm never going to see this movie, would someone who does see it, please tell me if Will Smith says "Oh, HELL NAW!!!" in his ridiculously overdone blaccent at least once? I think it's written into his standard contract that he gets to do that in every movie regardless of setting or plot.
Re: After Earth
Posted: Mon Jun 03, 2013 1:44 pm
by benjamin801
Murdoch wrote:The gf and I saw the preview for it when we went to go see the new Star Trek flick (which is awesome, btw), and we both agreed that After Earth looked like it would be fucking painful to watch.
Yeah, wife and I went to see Star Trek and there must have been four or five almost-identical sci-fi action flicks previewed. The only ones that stood out at all were Elysium, because it had Matt Damon and might not suck, and After Earth for the exact opposite reason.
Re: After Earth
Posted: Mon Jun 03, 2013 1:48 pm
by sleewell
after that shitshow with the hotel pool he should be totally reglegated to making straight to sci fi channel movies so that will only be shown from 4-6am so that no human being pays 10 bucks to see his crap ever again.
Re: After Earth
Posted: Mon Jun 03, 2013 1:52 pm
by Marc G
benjamin801 wrote:Murdoch wrote:The gf and I saw the preview for it when we went to go see the new Star Trek flick (which is awesome, btw), and we both agreed that After Earth looked like it would be fucking painful to watch.
Yeah, wife and I went to see Star Trek and there must have been four or five almost-identical sci-fi action flicks previewed. The only ones that stood out at all were Elysium, because it had Matt Damon and might not suck, and After Earth for the exact opposite reason.
Elysium does look pretty good... still will like to see/read a little more about it before I commit to paying for it.
Re: After Earth
Posted: Mon Jun 03, 2013 1:54 pm
by benjamin801
Murdoch wrote:Apparently the one with Mark "say hello to ya mutha fah me" Wahlberg and Zooey was a steaming pile of rhino shit
The Happening.
Horrible.

"People laughing out loud in the theater during moments intended to be scary or touching" levels of bad.

Re: After Earth
Posted: Mon Jun 03, 2013 1:58 pm
by nightflameauto
Airbender was a waste of digital space. Seriously, every DVD and BluRay of that movie should be rounded up and burned, and the fumes from the plastic melt should be used to gas M. Night Dingafuckadingdong into utter and complete oblivion. It simply made NO sense. Not even a single scene held together at the story level. It was literally like a scatterbrained teenager was handed a film crew and they went, "oh, this would be cool, and then how 'bout we do this, and then try that" for two hours. Zero script, zero planning, zero execution, zero editing. Just wandering shit.
Re: After Earth
Posted: Mon Jun 03, 2013 2:04 pm
by Marc G
nightflameauto wrote:Airbender was a waste of digital space. Seriously, every DVD and BluRay of that movie should be rounded up and burned, and the fumes from the plastic melt should be used to gas M. Night Dingafuckadingdong into utter and complete oblivion. It simply made NO sense. Not even a single scene held together at the story level. It was literally like a scatterbrained teenager was handed a film crew and they went, "oh, this would be cool, and then how 'bout we do this, and then try that" for two hours. Zero script, zero planning, zero execution, zero editing. Just wandering shit.
Airbender suffered mostly because they tried to condense a fairly long story line from 3 seasons of the cartoon in to 2 hours or so... can't happen... that and TERRIBLE acting...
Re: After Earth
Posted: Mon Jun 03, 2013 2:16 pm
by benjamin801
Marc G wrote:Airbender suffered mostly because they tried to condense a fairly long story line from 3 seasons of the cartoon in to 2 hours or so... can't happen... that and TERRIBLE acting...
Also don't forget quasi-racist casting and THE worst 3-D treatment by a major studio in the past decade. Beyond being unwatchably bad, it was practically unwatchable, period. Dark, flat, weird looking.
Re: After Earth
Posted: Mon Jun 03, 2013 2:17 pm
by nightflameauto
Marc G wrote:Airbender suffered mostly because they tried to condense a fairly long story line from 3 seasons of the cartoon in to 2 hours or so... can't happen... that and TERRIBLE acting...
While I'm sure the condensation issue probably played a part, I'd be tempted to say a larger part, and likely what led to the horrendous performances of the actors, was M. Night's inability to be coherent in a story. I imagine his direction to be something akin to:
"Do stuff" *WAVES HANDS*
They do the scene, he gets mad, only able to articulate, "I SAID DO STUFF! U DO STUFF! FUCK!"
They do the scene again, he gets madder, "FUCK ALL YOU! I'M GOING TO MY TRAILER!" Which he does, and then imbibes HUGE amounts of narcotics to live with the pain of being him while the actors, camera crew, and the rest are left to figure out WTF he meant by Stuff. He comes back loaded to the gills, plays what they've done back, the drug-haze convinces him it's brilliant, so they move on.
Repeat for each scene.
Re: After Earth
Posted: Mon Jun 03, 2013 2:22 pm
by Marc G
benjamin801 wrote:Marc G wrote:Airbender suffered mostly because they tried to condense a fairly long story line from 3 seasons of the cartoon in to 2 hours or so... can't happen... that and TERRIBLE acting...
Also don't forget quasi-racist casting and THE worst 3-D treatment by a major studio in the past decade. Beyond being unwatchably bad, it was practically unwatchable, period. Dark, flat, weird looking.
yeah.... it was a terrible 3D treatment... to be fair though other than Avatar ALL 3D movies that year and for years after were done terribly.
Re: After Earth
Posted: Mon Jun 03, 2013 6:59 pm
by ovid9
benjamin801 wrote:Murdoch wrote:Apparently the one with Mark "say hello to ya mutha fah me" Wahlberg and Zooey was a steaming pile of rhino shit
The Happening.
Horrible.

"People laughing out loud in the theater during moments intended to be scary or touching" levels of bad.

That is seriously one of the worst "major" films I've ever seen. Absolutely horrible. The story was dumb as shit, the acting was TERRIBLE, I mean, even for Marky Mark it was TERRIBLE and you spent most of the movie wishing everyone would die because then the movie would be over.