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Anyone ever took a Cologuard test? My doctor wanted me to take one instead of a Colonoscopy because I had one done 5 years ago. Fucking Cologuard test came back POSITIVE I show NO signs of colon cancer

I'm sure your doctor will order a follow up colonoscopy. Hope everything is okay and that's a false positive (12% are).

Hope you’re alright, man!

GuitarBilly wrote:I'm sure your doctor will order a follow up colonoscopy. Hope everything is okay and that's a false positive (12% are).

Colonoscopy in my future

Well, they do say it's 92% effective on their site. Let's hope your test fell in that 8% inaccurate bracket.

linthat22 wrote:Well, they do say it's 92% effective on their site. Let's hope your test fell in that 8% inaccurate bracket.

Also talks about different foods causing a positive test. I also have a few hemorrhoids so maybe one of them had a bit of blood leak. Don't normally have problems with them.

Pepi wrote:

GuitarBilly wrote:I'm sure your doctor will order a follow up colonoscopy. Hope everything is okay and that's a false positive (12% are).

Colonoscopy in my future

yeah it's awful bit it's important to reconfirm these results.

GuitarBilly wrote:

Pepi wrote:

GuitarBilly wrote:I'm sure your doctor will order a follow up colonoscopy. Hope everything is okay and that's a false positive (12% are).

Colonoscopy in my future

yeah it's awful bit it's important to reconfirm these results.

I had one a while back, and it wasn't as bad as I was expecting. They knocked me out, and when I woke up from my little nap they were already done. Easy peezy. I had to fart a lot afterwards, but I didn't wake up feeling violated or anything.

Not being able to eat solid food for two days before, and the drano like stuff that you have to drink the night before to clean you out, are the worst part of the experience, in my opinion.

Hopefully it's a false positive and you have nothing worry about.

On a funny note, a friend of mine had a classic line about his colonoscopy. He said, "I don't understand why the doctor had to turn down the lights and put music on".

MikeO wrote:I had one a while back, and it wasn't as bad as I was expecting. They knocked me out, and when I woke up from my little nap they were already done. Easy peezy. I had to fart a lot afterwards, but I didn't wake up feeling violated or anything.

Not being able to eat solid food for two days before, and the drano like stuff that you have to drink the night before to clean you out, are the worst part of the experience, in my opinion.

truf

I’ve had 4 scopes done. The preparation is the worst part IMO

Pepi wrote:

linthat22 wrote:Well, they do say it's 92% effective on their site. Let's hope your test fell in that 8% inaccurate bracket.

Also talks about different foods causing a positive test. I also have a few hemorrhoids so maybe one of them had a bit of blood leak. Don't normally have problems with them.

And with your next colonoscopy they'll drill out those rhoids so you won't have to worry about them tainting your next cologuard test. Unless you get new rhoids by then.

Dick Butter Nuts wrote:

Pepi wrote:

linthat22 wrote:Well, they do say it's 92% effective on their site. Let's hope your test fell in that 8% inaccurate bracket.

Also talks about different foods causing a positive test. I also have a few hemorrhoids so maybe one of them had a bit of blood leak. Don't normally have problems with them.

And with your next colonoscopy they'll drill out those rhoids so you won't have to worry about them tainting your next cologuard test. Unless you get new rhoids by then.

You and I need to quit seeing each other

Dick Butter Nuts wrote:

Pepi wrote:

linthat22 wrote:Well, they do say it's 92% effective on their site. Let's hope your test fell in that 8% inaccurate bracket.

Also talks about different foods causing a positive test. I also have a few hemorrhoids so maybe one of them had a bit of blood leak. Don't normally have problems with them.

And with your next colonoscopy they'll drill out those rhoids so you won't have to worry about them tainting your next cologuard test. Unless you get new rhoids by then.

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lQJVn_VO_l8[/youtube]

Had the scope today. Doctor said no cancer. He did cut off two polyp but he said he would not even send them in for test if it wasn't protocol. He said the Cologuard will detect polyps even if they are not bleeding? Something about a different DNA in your stool

That's great to hear Pepi. Glad you are ok. Did they let you keep the polyps as souvenir?

congrats, dude!

Can you eat the polyps like hippies eat placenta??

BroSlinger wrote:congrats, dude!

Can you eat the polyps like hippies eat placenta??

I figured he would drop them into his martini like olives.

Good stuff man, glad you're in the clear.

Watched him snip them off. They look like a skin tag.

Pepi wrote:Watched him snip them off. They look like a skin tag.

Well, did he enjoy the smell of your colon?

Pepi wrote:Watched him snip them off. They look like a skin tag.

Now you're speed bump free!

TurboPablo wrote:

Pepi wrote:Watched him snip them off. They look like a skin tag.

Well, did he enjoy the smell of your colon?

I was pretty cleaned out ready for the BIG one. Couple times I thought I was going to have an orgasm

Pepi wrote:

TurboPablo wrote:

Pepi wrote:Watched him snip them off. They look like a skin tag.

Well, did he enjoy the smell of your colon?

I was pretty cleaned out ready for the BIG one. Couple times I thought I was going to have an orgasm

I love you Peepee; glad you're okay!