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The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 9:08 am
by Demiurge
Is when it comes out of you.
Jesus christ.
HP Lovecraft described it well : "The Thing cannot be described—there is no language for such abysms of shrieking and immemorial lunacy, such eldritch contradictions of all matter, force, and cosmic order.”
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 9:13 am
by guitarcapo
Wendy's Hot and Spicy Chicken sandwich meal. Substitute the fries with chili. Number 6 on the board. It really should be number 2.
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 9:16 am
by TurboPablo
Worst and Pizza are words that should never be used together.
It's like using Bacon and yuck in the same sentence.
Hope your bunghole is ok.
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 9:17 am
by sleewell
didnt you eat that pizza like a week ago? have you not shat since then???
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 9:24 am
by OverDriven
I have a weird stomach. Doesn't matter what I eat - it all comes out the same. No runs, no splatters. Just a nice, smooth stink paste.
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 9:28 am
by nakedzen
The worst thing about eating a whole pizza is not having anymore pizza.
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 9:29 am
by Demiurge
OverDriven wrote:I have a weird stomach. Doesn't matter what I eat - it all comes out the same. No runs, no splatters. Just a nice, smooth stink paste.
stink paste lolololol
no i ate another one last night for my birthday.
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 9:30 am
by BroSlinger
One time, I ate a whole pizza and puked it out onto some astroturf. The pile kind of still looked like a pizza.
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 9:31 am
by Devin
nakedzen wrote:The worst thing about eating a whole pizza is not having anymore pizza.
This man knows whats up
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 10:03 am
by Sasquatch
I once took a dump that hurt so bad my body released endorphins. I got real sweaty and lightheaded and to keep from passing out, took all my clothes off in the stall I was using...at work. Just standing there naked and wondering what happened. I had to take leave and go home bc in the process of taking my clothes off I apparently didn't unbutton my shirt and instead ripped it off.
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 10:05 am
by Demiurge
Sasquatch wrote:I once took a dump that hurt so bad my body released endorphins. I got real sweaty and lightheaded and to keep from passing out, took all my clothes off in the stall I was using...at work. Just standing there naked and wondering what happened. I had to take leave and go home bc in the process of taking my clothes off I apparently didn't unbutton my shirt and instead ripped it off.
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 10:23 am
by Diddlybo
Sasquatch wrote:I once took a dump that hurt so bad my body released endorphins. I got real sweaty and lightheaded and to keep from passing out, took all my clothes off in the stall I was using...at work. Just standing there naked and wondering what happened. I had to take leave and go home bc in the process of taking my clothes off I apparently didn't unbutton my shirt and instead ripped it off.
I want to respond to this post...but I don't know how...or why.
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 10:23 am
by madryan
Sasquatch wrote:I once took a dump that hurt so bad my body released endorphins. I got real sweaty and lightheaded and to keep from passing out, took all my clothes off in the stall I was using...at work. Just standing there naked and wondering what happened. I had to take leave and go home bc in the process of taking my clothes off I apparently didn't unbutton my shirt and instead ripped it off.
Epic as fuck that is...
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 10:31 am
by Devin
Sasquatch wrote:I once took a dump that hurt so bad my body released endorphins. I got real sweaty and lightheaded and to keep from passing out, took all my clothes off in the stall I was using...at work. Just standing there naked and wondering what happened. I had to take leave and go home bc in the process of taking my clothes off I apparently didn't unbutton my shirt and instead ripped it off.
I love you so much
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 10:55 am
by Anomaly
Try taking a shit after taking opiates daily. It's like shitting rocks, seriously.
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 11:08 am
by metalguy
Sasquatch wrote:I once took a dump that hurt so bad my body released endorphins. I got real sweaty and lightheaded and to keep from passing out, took all my clothes off in the stall I was using...at work. Just standing there naked and wondering what happened. I had to take leave and go home bc in the process of taking my clothes off I apparently didn't unbutton my shirt and instead ripped it off.
and sig'd
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 11:29 am
by Yarbicus
Demiurge wrote:Is when it comes out of you.
Jesus christ.
HP Lovecraft described it well : "The Thing cannot be described—there is no language for such abysms of shrieking and immemorial lunacy, such eldritch contradictions of all matter, force, and cosmic order.”
This is the best use of a Lovecraft quote I have seen in ages. A+!
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 11:30 am
by 100 watt
Anomaly wrote:Try taking a shit after taking opiates daily. It's like shitting rocks, seriously.
I had a heavy round of oral surgury about 10 years ago. I was taking shitloads of Lortab. I went a week & a half without dropping a log. It SUCKED. NOT cool.
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 11:43 am
by Sasquatch
Anomaly wrote:Try taking a shit after taking opiates daily. It's like shitting rocks, seriously.
That's bc instead of your butthole shaping a malleable pile of stink grease into hotdog sized filth sausages, your stink grease cures and hardens in your colon, which is larger than your leather Cheerio, and then forces out a shit brick; CTB/gape. (Colon to bowl)
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 11:48 am
by marshallnoise
What the fuck is going on in here?
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 1:01 pm
by Devin
Anomaly wrote:Try taking a shit after taking opiates daily. It's like shitting rocks, seriously.
Bloody rocks
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 1:43 pm
by VTM
Sasquatch wrote:I had to take leave and go home bc in the process of taking my clothes off I apparently didn't unbutton my shirt and instead ripped it off.
Are you the guy that was considering cheating on his wife with a workplace milf? And now you are at work and taking turbo dumps then ripping off your clothes? I think I like this.
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 2:31 pm
by Sasquatch
David Lee Broth wrote:Sasquatch wrote:I had to take leave and go home bc in the process of taking my clothes off I apparently didn't unbutton my shirt and instead ripped it off.
Are you the guy that was considering cheating on his wife with a workplace milf? And now you are at work and taking turbo dumps then ripping off your clothes? I think I like this.
Lerlezzz
I came to my senses about that. I was goin through a bit of a pre-midlife crisis. I have also learned to not eat any hot peppers again.
The epic dump was approx 4 years ago. I had a buttoned up shirt that I ripped open and somehow the cuff on my left sleeve (long sleeve dress shirt) was ripped all the way up to my elbow.
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 6:37 pm
by Dave Lister
Anomaly wrote:Try taking a shit after taking opiates daily. It's like shitting rocks, seriously.
Yup. That's a real side effect of opiates. It's theorized that's why Elvis died on the shitter. Too much straining caused him to stimulate his vagal nerve which caused a significant drop in his pulse and blood pressure.
Re: The worst part about eating an entire pizza
Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 7:17 pm
by Rampage
I remember whenever they first started doing that $5 pizza deal whenever I was in high school. A few friends and I would get hammered and then solo some pizzas.
Being the fat one, I would eat leftover slices the twig boys couldn't finish.
I'm not proud.
Yes I am.